JIM CREES: Bachmann calls for a new Crusade

After hearing I lived a good chunk of my life in the Middle East, many folks are absolutely flabbergasted when I admit I have no solution to the chaos, confusion, and turmoil that has taken, is taking, and will continue to take place in that part of the world.

No solution.


But then, I don’t have the smarts of a Michelle Bachmann or the moxie of a Bill O’Reilly.

These two are waaaaaaay smarter than am I. They have the answers to Middle East peace.

At a recent gathering of hyper-conservative “patriots” entitled the Values Voter Summit, Bachmann went on a pretty impressive rant suggesting the U.S. as a “Christian country” simply needed to declare war on Islam.

“This is spiritual warfare and what we need to do is defeat Islamic jihad,” stated Rep. Bachmann, warming up to her appreciative audience.

“Sadly, our president has the wrong prescription,” she continued “He even fails to acknowledge their motivations for bringing out jihad. Yes, Mr. President, it is about Islam! And I believe if you have an evil of an order of this magnitude, you take it seriously.

“You declare war on it, you don’t dance around it. ...”

Yes. Now there’s an idea.

Don’t declare war on ... um ... e r ... say, another country.

Bachmann says we need to declare war on an entire religion!

Declare war on Islam.

Hmmmmmm ... Now, that’s never been done before.

Oh, wait.

It HAS been done before.

The entire Christian world declared war on Islam during the Crusades.

Lemme see. How did that turn out?

Well ... the Christians got their collective keisters handed to them in a basket!

Saladin embarrassed the pride of Europe; ultimately decimated the Crusader armies; and unified the entire Middle East — and then some — against the Christian invaders.

The old-timey Crusades failed largely for three reasons. Let’s see if they sound mildly familiar.

First, Western armies were by far and away much stronger and better equipped than anything the Moslem locals could muster. The Western Crusaders had much better military tactics, and had the best weaponry known to mankind.

BUT ... they could never maintain strategic numbers or continuously support the fighters they had in the field.

The Arab armies had nothing but virtually total support from the local population, and could field fresh troops on an almost daily basis.

The Western Crusaders could simply never hold on to the land they conquered. There were never enough of them.

Second, the Crusades were an overly extended and expensive proposition. European governments could not continuously afford to maintain troops so far away.

The Crusades brought European kingdoms to financial ruin.

Third, the Western governments were never wholly and totally unified behind the effort, even with the support of the Church.

In the 197-year history of the Crusades — when Christian Europe declared war on the Moslems, it is estimated that some 3,000,000 people died. (at a time when there were only 30,000,000 people in Europe!)

Yessir. Declare war on Islam.

There’s an idea.

Now, please note.

She didn’t say “Declare war on ISIS” or “Declare war on the Boko Haram.”

She said the U.S. should declare war on Islam. “Yes, Mr. President, it is about Islam.”

What a moron.

But ... the good folks at the Values Voter Summit went wild, apparently because they are just as ignorant as is she.

There. I said it. “Ignorant.”

Truth be known, (and you need to understand this well), Bachmann’s talk about a new Crusade will gain more followers for ISIS than anything coming out of the mouth of a ranting, raving Iman in Iraq or Syria.

And then, as if Bachmann’s silliness wasn’t painful enough, Bill O’Reilly had to spout off as well.

His suggestion for fighting ISIS?

O’Reilly would like to see the west, with the U.S. in the lead, create a 25,000 man mercenary army — kind of a massive hit squad!



No control. No oversight.

Just 25,000 heavily armed guys traveling around the globe killing people. Hopefully the right ones.

Ooooooops. Wrong one. Sorry.

Oh. My. God.

Even the right-wingers think it’s stupid.

“You’ve gone from out of the box to off the wall,” suggested Charles Krauthammer to O’Reilly. “Do you really want to be running around the world responsible for a band of desperadoes?”

Yes! Krauthammer thinks O’Reilly’s nuts!!!

A guy I think is a little loopy thinks a guy I believe is loopy is loopier than even I think!

Oh well. Whatever the case, get your suit-of-armor polish out from under the kitchen sink.

In the words of Jean D’Arc, “Mon dieu doit être servi.”

Or as the first Crusaders declared riding to battle and their death — “Deus vult.” (God wills it.)

Um ... not this time!